NEGOTIATING WITH THE OLDER GENERATION

But micro-weddings have their downsides too, as some couples face pressure from their parents who are offended by their children’s decision to leave out certain people from the guest list.

“There must always be a compromise. A marriage involves many people — not just the couple. So the family is very important when you plan a wedding”, said Ms Annabel Law, a wedding photographer who also creates custom wedding itineraries at Annabel Law Productions. 

For Ms Chua, her husband’s parents had preferred the “traditional wedding banquet”. But Mr Leong was adamant about his decision and the couple had to convince his parents that a small wedding was worth it.

He raised the fact that Ms Chua’s sister tied the knot without even telling her parents or holding a reception.

In response, Mr Leong’s parents felt that there should at least be a ceremony to allow Ms Chua’s parents to experience what it would be like to witness one of their daughters getting married.

Eventually, Mr Leong and Ms Chua organised a separate lunch with immediate family members when the pair gave their vows at the Registry of Marriages. 

“At the lunch, they were placated, felt satisfied, and also agreed there was not a need to splurge on a huge ceremony. At least, an event was held for close family”, said Mr Leong. 

The wedding celebration — consisting only of friends and colleagues — took place two months later.

Another newlywed, who declined to be named, said she held a wedding with only 13 guests in July 2022, and likewise faced some opposition from a family member. She spoke on condition of anonymity as she did not want to cause further strife with said relative.

The 37-year-old, who works in financial services, recounted how it was one of her husband’s aunts who got upset after finding out that she was not invited to the wedding. Because of that, the aunt did not talk to the newlywed’s mother-in-law for some time.

“(The aunt) was disappointed that the extended family was unable to witness the wedding,” she told TODAY. “She was like ‘How can the wider family not be invited?'”

Asked if she had any regrets about holding a smaller wedding, she said she “couldn’t control how people felt”, and that she did not feel “any bad vibes” from her wedding.

“Everyone at our wedding had a great and meaningful time,” she said.

On this, Ms Suhailah said that couples have to understand and respect the various perspectives of different generations when it comes to the size of wedding receptions.

“It’s always about communication. When you can be firm, remember to be nice. Sometimes compromise is necessary especially when it comes to customs and traditions that are important to the older generation”, she said.

“At the end of the day, everyone wants a happy celebration.”

WILL MICRO-WEDDINGS BECOME THE NORM?

While micro-weddings of fewer than 50 guests are still relatively rare here, wedding planners said their numbers show that weddings are growing smaller in size.

Pandemic safety practices might have normalised the trend, but Knotz co-founder Mr Ong believes this is also due to “the relentless increase in the prices of hotel wedding packages” recently.

Based on the weddings managed by Ms Law, the average number of guests per wedding has dipped from 350 to 250 following the pandemic.

Out of the 157 weddings that she managed in 2024, only seven were considered micro-weddings. Likewise for Vynella Events’ Ms Suhailah, there were only five micro-weddings out of 200 weddings organised by her firm in 2024.

“I predict that micro-weddings will become a trend in the next five years when Gen Zers start getting married. Right now, we are still in the millennial phase. People my age in general still listen to their parents,” said Ms Law, who has been in the wedding industry for more than a decade.

“But in the future, with Gen Zers’ individualistic mindsets, parents might have less say. And these parents will likely also be more forgiving (towards their children),” she added.